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Making peace with uncertainity

June 15, 2015

Two years ago I made the decision to walk away from my teaching career and find out what else was out there in the work world for me. Some people in my life probably thought I was crazy to leave a full-time jobs with benefits, but the reality was that my heart was no longer in teaching and it had come to the point where my health was being affected. I took a leap of faith and accepted a job at non-profit alternative school for at-risk teenage girls as an outreach counselor. One of the best decisions I've ever made.

I loved that job. I felt like my skills made me an important member of the team, loved the small staff I worked with, and loved helping the students. Honestly as happy as I was to move out of Florida I was sad to leave this place behind. Flash forward to a year later and I am in the midst of a self diagnosed career crisis. I'm about to turn 34 in August, dislike my current job, and am unsure of where I'm headed career wise.

For the first time in my post collegiate life I am underemployed. Underemployment is a sugar coated term for you are way over qualified for the job. It happens. People are mislead about job descriptions all the time and disappointed to find that the reality differs from what is initially presented.

In a way I have felt like I have been constantly searching for what I should do career wise. I came into college with the idea of majoring in Psychology, ended up switching to English with journalistic aspirations and after coming up short on the journalism job hunt decided to become an English teacher.  After making the transition out of classroom teaching I have actually had the time to think about what it is that I enjoy doing and I just feel like I'm coming up with more questions than answers.

In the last few months I have started looking for new opportunities and even interviewed for a few teaching positions. Up here teaching jobs pay much better than back in Florida, which is what was motivating me to apply for them. I even got asked to do a demo lesson at a school and I stepped back into a classroom for the first time in 2 years. I did well despite my nerves. What I wasn't doing was being honest with myself, the truth is that while I was a competent teacher my heart was no longer in it. I could spin my story in an interview but I am sure on some level it was apparent. So I'm back to the drawing board. I know what I don't want to do (teaching) and that I have a reignited love for writing and that I like a job where I can help people. I grew up believing that I would have a very defined career path like my parents. Now at almost 34 I'm starting to become comfortable with the idea that my professional life probably won't look like that and that is not a bad thing. I don't need to have it all figured out and that's ok.